Is this The End?

One of the most difficult topics with new clients is a discussion about endings. Sometimes a new client is leaving an existing adviser or abandoning their former way of thinking about their finances; however you will probably gather that I’m more of the Stephen Covey persuasion … of starting with the end in mind. I encourage discussion about what will have been truly important when you reach the end of your life and look back on your decisions.

At the start of the month, I went to see a new play by David Eldridge at the Dorfman – National Theatre simply called End. It’s a single act with just two characters – Alfie (Clive Owen) and Julie (Saskia Reeves). I found it utterly engaging. Set in north London in June 2016, it’s a remarkable piece full of topical history and poignancy. Alfie and Julie are confronted with an inability to communicate well in the present for fear of the future and the legacy of the past; a very familiar condition. As the play only runs until 17^th January 2026 I doubt I will be providing many with problematic spoilers.

We quickly learn that Alfie has terminal cancer but has had enough of the treatment, therefore he is thinking about his ‘end’ and reminiscing, but perhaps romanticising it. He doesn’t want Julie or their daughter with him, therefore he will say his goodbyes and head off quietly, like cats do. He wants to be buried with his parents.

Julie is shocked at his reluctance to continue his treatment, she wants him to fight to live and has been scouring the internet for alternative treatments. She admits her own romanticised ideas of burial, but it wouldn’t be with her mother-in-law and she also notes what a practical problem it would be for her to make the trip to visit the site anyway.

As you might expect, there are heated and emotionally exhausting exchanges. We learn of their past relational problems, their disappointments with one another and their very deep real love. We learn of their careers, triumphs and setbacks, their ‘dirty laundry’ and some of their contradictions. Life and relationships are never without complexity if they are honest. The societal setting is also helpful – Brexit, the recent end of an era as Alfie’s team (West Ham) moved from Upton Park to the Olympic stadium and his particular taste in music, acting as a wonderful signifier of change. There are plenty of nods to the social forces that are about to be unleashed and how for many of us progressives, the London Olympics was the high point of the last five decades with a decline ever since.

Alfie and Julie just about manage to navigate the highly charged topic of impending death, something that many of us have experienced (and some of you very recently) and undoubtedly each audience will have been touched deeply by these experiences too; it is all too common and all too ordinary, but ordinarily ignored or avoided. Dashed hopes and expectations from a life that we have little real control over.

The truth is that great financial planning is about your ‘story’, wherever it may have started and whatever direction it may take. My role is to help you to clarify what is important, therefore bringing a sense of structure and direction – and then build the financial pathway to facilitate this, but of course, we cannot predict the future. I have a crystal ball in the office as a bit of a joke, but I rarely use it in a meeting (it’s a fairly lame joke and to be honest I forget about it!). The point is of course that on one hand we all would quite like to know the future, believing it would provide the illusion of comfort, but the reality is almost precisely the opposite. Knowing the future strips the unpredictability of life and its joy. The little that we can truly control and hope to master is our response. Much like you, Alfie and Julie, I am also a work in progress with much to learn. I wonder how your conversation’s going about the one certainty?

Therefore as we face a new year, which appears to have begun with more chaos, quite deliberately manufactured by a deranged right wing, I am mindful of the challenges to be confronted, whilst acknowledging that people are people and beliefs, however baseless, are rather difficult to change.

Is this the end? Yes and no.  It is the end of something but the start of something else. What I do know is what you know … life is brief – so make the most of it. Was the play worth seeing? Most definitely, brilliant performances from both of them. You will probably be able to see it on the National Theatre streaming service.  Here is their trailer which gives little away (as a trailer should!):

Ref: https://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/productions/end/